Keeping this one brief. 2013 sucked in more ways than one. We lost several feline family members and found out most of the rest probably have FIV or leukemia. Our elderly dogs have started showing their age and another had to have emergency surgery to remove two huge bladder stones. I realized I still wouldn’t be able to afford health insurance. We made little progress with the new house — still no wiring — and most of the next month is going to be spent packing, building, and making trips to the vet. As for last year’s resolutions, I only met one: I opened a savings account and managed to hang on to $1,000.
The good? I received 25 rejections, which means I sent stories out almost twice as many times as last year, with helpful feedback to boot as well as one rewrite request (which I intend to get to as soon as this moving business is behind us).
I can’t say I’ve made any resolutions for the new year. I’ll be happy if I can make it through the first couple of months without ripping my hair out. I will keep writing, and reading, and saving. And what needs to get done will get done. Maybe, if there’s time, I’ll make peace with my demons.
A widower goes for a stroll through Old Town and stumbles across something more bizarre than himself.
This story first appeared in Shock Totem, issue #3 (January 2011) and was on the long list of honorable mentions for editor Ellen Datlow’s Best Horror of the Year.
My short story, “Duval Street,” is now available for free at Smashwords in a variety of formats. If you’re feeling generous, you can also get a copy from Amazon for 99 cents. (Is that too high for something less than a couple thousand words? Will anyone bother when it’s free elsewhere? Will Amazon eventually match the price? Let’s find out!) If you do splurge on it, consider leaving a review — be honest! — and I’ll send you cookies and happy cat pictures.
Don’t forget, you can always find it in the third issue of Shock Totem alongside stories by Amanda C. Davis, Aaron Polson, John Skipp, and more. Support them. They’re good people.
This was a thing three years ago, but despite keeping a log of everyone I supposedly wrote like I never made a post about it. Now that it’s making the rounds again, I figured I’d share.
I plugged in fragments of all of my finished stories, including fanfics, as well as four chapters of The Novel and a couple of WIPs. Apparently, I write most like Stephen King (4), David Foster Wallace (4), Chuck Palahniuk (2), Oscar Wilde (2), Margaret Mitchell (2), and William Gibson (2).
Yup.
There’s also some Asimov, Dickens, Anne Rice, Douglas Adams, Rudyard Kipling, Atwood, and Nabokov peppered in there.
Whiskers tickled his chin. A weight on his chest, no lighter than a bowling ball, shifted languidly from one rib to the other. His wrists bled. His ankles were bruised. His foggy eyes rolled in their sockets till they landed on hers, sharp blue and full of poison.
He whimpered, waiting for the next strike. It didn’t take long. A practiced set of crimson-stained claws flashed across his cheek, his nose, his lips. “Why?” He could hear the others, light feet pacing the room, flooding the stairwell. Some had wandered into the basement in search of smaller prey. “Why do you do this?” He wept, salt burning a trail from his eyes to the hair at his temples. She drew closer, smiling.
“It’s not your breath we want,” she hissed. “It’s your tears.”
• Stewie, the world’s longest cat, passed away at at the age eight. He was 48.5 inches from toe to tail, and his tail measured 16.34 inches. Wow.
• After seven days, the little boy held hostage in a bunker in Alabama has been freed and his kidnapper killed. The local children called Jimmy Lee Dykes — who believed the government and the mafia were controlling the dog races he bet on — “the scoop man.”
• Shooter Boys and At-Risk Girls, an essay by Molly Crabapple on the culture surrounding school shootings.
• Have you caught up on the Applebee’s scandal yet? Here’s a breakdown with photos.
• I’m still making my way through Moby Dick, and this annotated version has been especially useful.
• This handy list by Mary Robinette Kowal of every word used by Jane Austen, all 14,793 of them, is a great starting point for anyone writing historical fiction. Bonus Mary: How to make entrails!
• Looking for the motivation to write? Written? Kitten! to the rescue.
• Duotrope alternatives, in case you’re still looking: Dark Markets, Bloody Bookish, and Horror Tree for horror writers, and The Grinder for stats and tracking. Bloody Bookish in particular lets you easily add deadlines to your Google calendar.
• Chuck Wendig’s 25 thoughts on book piracy.
• More than $60,000 has been pledged to John Scalzi’s Counteract a Bigot drive. In return, Scalzi commissioned this brilliant piece of art. Shirts may be forthcoming.
• King Richard III’s body has been found beneath a parking lot in Leicester.
• The 256-year-old man, Li Ching-Yuen. He supposedly lived on rice, herbs, and wine and said the secret to longevity was to “keep a quiet heart, sit like a tortoise, walk sprightly like a pigeon, and sleep like a dog.” His age is disputed; Ching-Yuen himself said he was 197. Do you believe it?
• Hey, Amazon? No.
I wish I could say I was surprised to see a screencap making the rounds of Twisted Dreams editor Andrea Dean Van Scoyoc lambasting a writer for asking what her pay rates were. Instead, I thought, “Huh. So my instinct was right.”
I submitted a story to Twisted Dreams Magazine in 2006. For those of you pointing out the garish web design and poor copy, it could be worse. Its only presence could still be a badly managed Myspace page. After Andrea offered what was meant to be helpful criticism (she didn’t understand that the ambiguity was intentional and suggested I explain, in detail, where the bloody body parts had come from), I tweaked it, resubmitted, and it went on to appear in the spring issue that April. I was stoked at the time. I was still naive enough to think that exposure was reward enough and that having to buy my own copy (my mother was so proud) was a sort of career investment. The red flags didn’t become clear until years later, and I kept waiting for someone else to bite the bullet and point them out so I could feel better about thumping the cover whenever I pass the magazine rack beside my desk. Yes, I do that. No, I don’t know why I haven’t just tucked it away in the back. It’s the emo in me, all right?
I won’t comment on Andrea’s “best selling” books or her role as a “trail blazer” in the field. But it’s pretty damn obvious that as an editor/publisher, she has a lot to learn. Or would have if she hadn’t dug her own grave.
It’s not just that her guidelines are ridiculous. It’s not just that she offers zero compensation. It’s not just that the website is an utter mess. It’s everything, and her attitude toward potential authors is particularly off-putting. It reeks of “I’ve been in this business longer than you” and “look how edgy I can be!” For the record, Andrea was sweet as pie to me. I never felt intimidated or talked down to. Why the change? If you’re exasperated enough with what you deem unacceptable submissions to actually chastise your audience, then maybe it’s time to pack up your toys and go home. Is there anything wrong with writing for no pay, or offering only exposure for printing it? Of course not, within reason. But show some fucking appreciation for your writers. Bullying them will get you nowhere.
You can read my story “Dinner for Two,” which appeared in Twisted Dreams’s April 2006 issue, here.
My resolutions going into the year were simple enough. I intended to switch hosts and revamp the site, which I did. I wanted to read at least 50 books, a goal I’ve set every year for as long as I can remember but never reached. This year was no different, but I did manage to finish 34 which is a personal best. I wanted to write everyday and push out a novella; didn’t happen, but I spent more time fleshing out The Novel and I had two short stories published. Not bad.
The largest chunk of the year was spent searching and negotiating and packing. Yup, we’re moving house. Back to Dogtown proper but in a (hopefully) better location than before. While the circumstances are still crummy, this time we have some wiggle room and we’ll be bringing a few new family members along for the ride.
Someone stole our mailbox then someone else put up a brand new one in the span of an afternoon. That, or they backed into it and did the right thing by replacing it. But the first scenario’s funnier.
I released a small collection of poetry in late 2011 and earlier this year it received its first review. I had to save it, it made me smile.
Oh wow. This book stinks. Its all about blood and killing. If you get it, read it and you will agree. It was NOT for kids. Saying it is intense. You shouldn’t waste your money on things evn if they are free like this one. Instead read harry potter or percy jackson. VERY interesting. Even though they arent like this one, they are for kids. This is a book for adults and not saying it is bad on everything. It is really good to do song writing. I tryed it and this author is good.
“Duval Street” made Ellen Datlow’s honorable mentions list for 2011. I cut out caffeine. I set up Adam Cesare’s shiny new blog. I wrote pirate/ninja smut which surprised me by doubling as back story for one of my favorite characters. I squeed with Mercedes M. Yardley over her book. However brief, Tawny Kitaen started following me on Twitter.
So where to go in 2013? I want to finish 50 books by the end of the year, for real this time. Finish The Novel. I want to write at least 5 short stories (hey, that’s a leap for me!) and see them all published. I want to blog more often, say, twice a month at least. Find a writing group and stick with it. Join SFWA, HWA, or both. Start journaling again. I want to save $1,000 and pay off my credit cards. I want to paint something, even if I have to use a stencil. And I want to finish a meal in public without retching from the nerves.
To fresh starts and new beginnings. Happy New Year’s, all of you.
